Who wears a wallet chain?!
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I believe in your delicious
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
