the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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