so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
