And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize
