Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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