Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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