pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I FOUND THE LEGS
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
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