You can't motorboat a personality
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Randomize
