you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
