Is it normal to miss your booty call?
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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