u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
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