i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
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