I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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