The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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