I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Randomize
