i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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