Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
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