Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Randomize