At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
25 People Admit the Worst Things They’ve Done for Good Reasons
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
25 Things All Men Can Definitely Agree On
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.