Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns? http://tfl.nu/p7xv
  Replies (5) Good night (541) Bad night (1970) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  that's an acceptable place to lick

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (212): that's an acceptable place to lick http://tfl.nu/6rie
  Replies (11) Good night (3977) Bad night (462) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (289): View more from Ontario

  i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (289): i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going? http://tfl.nu/rdp8
  Replies (20) Good night (662) Bad night (5141) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (650): we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA http://tfl.nu/902z
  Replies (36) Good night (2917) Bad night (841) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (307): if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself. http://tfl.nu/s9we
  Replies (64) Good night (1830) Bad night (4719) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (419): I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included? http://tfl.nu/4lo3
  Replies (17) Good night (4990) Bad night (1056) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (+06): View more from

  We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+06): We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away. http://tfl.nu/dvn1
  Replies (13) Good night (6226) Bad night (880) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver. http://tfl.nu/mj0i
  Replies (8) Good night (2200) Bad night (1641) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are. http://tfl.nu/937u
  Replies (9) Good night (5042) Bad night (830) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (907): I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex. http://tfl.nu/ckwf
  Replies (9) Good night (2539) Bad night (1176) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (253): If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life. http://tfl.nu/jc0t
  Replies (15) Good night (3167) Bad night (652) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right. http://tfl.nu/6rqx
  Replies (7) Good night (477) Bad night (1052)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person. http://tfl.nu/f02c
  Replies (7) Good night (713) Bad night (1071) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful http://tfl.nu/mqfz
  Replies (7) Good night (628) Bad night (280) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (760): Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs http://tfl.nu/ndm8
  Replies (3) Good night (546) Bad night (170) Order T-Shirt

Randomize