The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
