dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
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