Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
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