I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
