my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Drunk is not a location!
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
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