This girl is more easily done than said...
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
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