The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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