remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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