Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
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