D3 body, D1 cock
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
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