home. puking in laundry basket.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Someone came in the potted fern
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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