hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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