How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
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You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
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Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
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