and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
