If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
