Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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