it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
so let's talk penis.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Randomize
