You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
