I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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