**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
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