it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Randomize
