I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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