I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
