went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
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I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
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did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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