can u get pink eye on your cock?
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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