i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
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So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
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He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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