So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
