When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
