Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Randomize
