ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I lost the right to judge tonight
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
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