so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Never let your siblings swipe right.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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