This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I seem to have left my pride at pride
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
